Why You Won't Reach Your NYE Resolutions
I was chatting with the barista at my favorite coffee shop and mentioned that I was challenging myself to write every day. He remarked that I seemed like someone that always accomplishes everything that I set out to do. I told him that yes, but I wasn't always this way. I've failed and failed again until I understood how to accomplish goals.
Here’s my foolproof formula:
Focus on one thing. Creating a list of 10 things and starting them all at the same time is pretty much a guaranteed way to fail. Oh, I’m going to lose 20 pounds, write daily, eat well, learn a new language and I’ll start all of this on January 1. Eh. I give that plan 2 days tops. You have to pick one thing and give that all of your energy.
Pay attention to the voices and change the story. Be aware of the story that you're telling yourself about what you're trying to accomplish. “I'll never be able to go to the gym every day. I hate working out. It's hard to lose weight.” None of these are truths. It's just a story that you've created and you can change. I’d recommend writing affirmations that are the opposite of what you’ve been telling yourself and repeating it daily.
Start right away. When the idea comes to you, start immediately. Don't wait until January 1 or next Monday or some other time in the distant future. Immediately do it before the voices in your head talk you out of it.
Make it a habit. Do it long enough until it's a habit and you don’t even think about it anymore. I know you’ve heard it takes 21 days to form a habit. I say bullshit (research does as well). It takes about 66 days until you’re on autopilot. I find it best if I give myself closer to 90 days.
Repeat. After you’ve completed all the steps, then and only then can you pick another goal. Once you decide on something else, go through all of the steps. Your other goals will be automatic and you give all of your energy to the new thing you’re trying to achieve.
If you’ve been doing the math, this means you’ll only be able to achieve a maximum of 4 things each year. It might not seem like a lot, but that’s an incredible accomplishment. Even achieving one goal would be huge. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself for anything more.